Big legs, widows peak, and moles are all something we wear every day that our parents may also have. It’s something we receive unfortunately, and unplanned, but makes us more appreciative as we mature. My family has the big legs and varicose veins, yet I still cross my legs all the time and spend countless hours in the gym trying to transform my physique. I’m not mad that my body is this way, and I wouldn’t pay any money to change it further.
Some other things passed down may be a laugh, a saying, a behavior that’s followed by, “Oh my god i’m turning into my mother/father.” These are traits we pass on ourselves from our loved ones without intention, and again, eventually learn how to appreciate them.
What else do we get passed down? Alcoholism, bad spending habits and relationship issues. Being in college has made me realize that there is a made up week just for the drinkers and each day rhymes with getting drunk. Some parties have even been titled ‘Black-out or get out.’ It’s a more potent aspect of our generation than we think, because as humans, we naturally form excuses that make our conscious feel better about doing the wrong thing. That’s when it becomes natural.
I’ve always been warned about becoming a drinker because of my family’s (dad’s) history and I always shake it off. I’m also aware of the affect it had on my family and family friends, including myself growing up. Now, i’m encountering friends who are worried about alcoholism and the excuse is just that we’re in college. My advice, celebrate when necessary and have a job if you like quality drinks. It’s unfortunate that we have to be afraid of the characteristics passed down from older generations, but we need to also take their advice on their own mistakes. I’m a firm believer in learning from your experiences, good or bad, and evolving from that. I’m continuously aware of alcoholism or laughing like my mother, and I think if I ever lose sight of it, i’ll be in trouble, just like my father was.
I’ve tried to pay close attention to the examples of relationships in my life too in order to find the right prince charming, or whatever. My mom and dad were 18 years apart, and her mom disliked him and the first marriage. EIGHTEEN YEARS, and yet people get criticized all the time for dating someone only a few years apart. I haven’t followed in the footsteps of those relationship examples, but I’m starting to think that I’ll have no choice but to have the same thoughts and actions as those involuntarily. I cared about being married before, however, I’m months away from adult life and I want to vomit flipping passed wedding dress shows. Seriously, they all look the same to me. Big, white, fluffy, tight, etc. It’s supposed to be the most incredible moment in your life and all that mumbo jumbo, but then years later you’re divorced or seeing a couples therapist.
Part of the inspiration for this talk was skimming through an article that read 10 Reasons Why This Generation is Losing The Ability to Love. It happens because of laziness, technology, or instant gratification issues, etc. It’s in movies and amongst your friends how relationships run. I grew up around a lot of kids who’s parents were divorced, and I can’t speak on their mental state of mind, but I know now that they’re all extremely close with each parent individually because of how they’ve changed. Sometimes getting married at a young age happens because of pressure and age deadlines, but if being eighteen isn’t mature enough for someone to make good decisions in college, I don’t see how a 24 year old can sign their life away to another person and vow to such intense promises.
Your parents are your direct example of life while growing up. You can live life like Roseanne constantly saying she’ll never be like her mother, but she always ended up acting like the crazy bat. Some physical and mental features may never be altered, but you have to take everything with a grain of salt and adapt to what lemons life handed you. I strongly think I’m a part of a naive, lazy, and ridiculous generation, but we’ve only learned from the path created prior. We’re desensitized, contain unrealistic ideas, and we’re never satisfied/always wanting more. It’s unfortunate and a blessing in disguise to be your parents spitting genes. Do with it what you will.
Have a great rest of the weekend.